Today I've decided to deal with an issue that plagues me regularly. For reasons that I don't understand yet blame on my father, my hair has an unrealistic aspiration towards a fauxhawk; unrealistic in that it refuses to stand UP - a necessary feature of this hairstyle. This is what it looks like most mornings when it starts to get longer.
Since the fauxhawk is a mainstay of European football, I thought I would make a pictorial comparison. Below is Cesc Fabergas of Arsenal. Notice that his hair length and cut isn't appreciably different from mine but look how well his behaves.
Now look at my boy, Jamie Carragher of Liverpool. He and I are fellow anti-fauxhawk sufferers. Our hair will gladly go forward and together in the middle but all we get is a rockin' Eddie Munster widow's peak.
In celebration of another disappointing almost-fauxhawk day, I decided to develop a "soulhawk." I'm sure that I'm not the first person to think of this and even if I am, it would be much better introduced by someone with a patch that doesn't look like corn silk. Still, I'm sportin' a short beard and longer soul patch for Easter this year.
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2 thoughts:
ReplyDelete1) a fauxhawk is actually a stabilizing device. When you're running up and down the pitch for 90+ minutes it really cuts down the the neck fatigue. Your head stays nice and straight.
2) a fauxhawk is primarily used for those nifty flicks to the far post. If enough gel is applied, the ridge of hair actually catches the ball and "sling-shoots" it into the back of the net.
I suspected that the style had a primarily utilitarian function...because of course, footballers would never do something just for the look.
ReplyDeleteAs another "high speed low drag" guy myself, I have dabbled in the fauxhawk. However, I have found it impractical, as the fauxhawk for less of a hairstyle and more of a lifestyle - but my publicist, agent, marketer, and hairgel subsidizer all agree it makes me look faster - which is the whole point anyway...
ReplyDeleteGlad to hear about the UTV!!!